Curing Boredom in New York
by hellsbells101
Summary: *Twisted Shorts 2012* Since Sunnydale the chosen two have found their slaying activites curtailed to the point their BORED. What starts off as staving off boredom in New York soon turns out to be a whole new chapter in the Slayers lives. Now a ficlet series - Ch4 Faith and Steve are having one of those days but can they find a refuge.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own either Avenger or Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I only own my twisted imagination._  
_Beta: For advice and helping me to de-Brit my speech; thanks has to go to ConstanceTruggle - Not before not set in my badass verse._

* * *

Buffy was sitting in the London House with Faith, and they were extremely bored. After Sunnydale fell, there had been many changes amongst the core Scoobies. For one, Wesley returned to the fold, not liking the path that Angel was following. He could never join them at the law firm because as far as he was concerned; no matter what your attentions it was a Bad Idea. Well, he'd often heard the phrase when younger that the road to hell was paved with good intentions, and that is what he saw happening at Wolfram and Hart.

Back home, there had also been many changes The Council now had schools where the Slayers could gain an education. Willow had taken over one of the schools, along with Kennedy and Oz. As far as the romantic relationship between them; well, they weren't asking and the trio wasn't telling. Xander was currently living it up with the shamans in Africa, which left Buffy, Faith, Giles and Wesley recreating the Council. Surprisingly, Buffy had found that she could employ her leadership skills to a new field and was taking the political scene by storm.

Faith had sworn to follow Buffy into any battle, and if that included swanky parties - well then so be it. The last surprise had not been predicted. Wesley had offered to adopt Faith, obviously she was an adult but in England, he and Giles were Lords and could wield influence. He wanted to support Faith in a way he'd never managed to when she was younger. Giles had thought the idea brilliant and offered the same to Buffy and Dawn. It had been a no brainer; all three had accepted the deal.

For Buffy and Dawn, it had offered them a father figure who actually cared. Dawn was not enjoying it so much when he imposed a curfew - much to Buffy's delight. Dawn had gotten her own back on the slayers, though - as she started curtsying to Lady Faith and Lady Elizabeth. Buffy knew she couldn't fight it so she went with it.

* * *

The only problem though was that their own slaying had been curtailed as they were given other duties. It sucked but the only time they could slay was when they were around each other. The minis were a little too hero struck, and they had taken the sensible decision to stay back. The last thing they wanted to do was distract the slayers because a distracted slayer was a dead slayer.

Which is why the girls were sitting in the council house watching the news, feeling bored. The news was reporting the invasion of New York. They cocked their head to the side, and watched in fascination.

"Huh! Now there is something that you don't see every day," the brunette slayer observed

Buffy loved Faith's ability to state the obvious. She watched the Superhero group take a stand. Still, there were six of them and way more enemies.

Faith quirked an eyebrow, "I know they'e aliens and maybe not in the job description…"

Buffy grinned, it was not often that Faith actually whined, so she took pity and finished, "...and some of them are hot, and you think they need a hand."

Faith looked earnest, well, as earnest and as innocent as she could manage. "It's the right thing to do."

Buffy nodded, "I agree lets go and find some weapons and lend a hand."

This was the girls room in the council house, which meant that they did not have far to go. Buffy loaded up with her favourite throwing stars, they were just so shiny around her waist. She then added a few daggers, as well as the scythe before finishing with her favourite crossbow.

Faith favoured her longsword, she added several knives, which she flicked up in the air before they were secreted away. She also gained a crossbow, but they loved their crossbows for good reason. Willow had put spells on their crossbows that once they fired an arrow, the mechanism would automatically reload. Willow made the best arrows - they landed on their target and then they exploded.

Feeling ready, and eager to lose some of their restless energy Buffy called Dawn. She was really glad that Dawn was home from Oxford.

Dawnie was a mind-reader because she came ready with the wicca materials to make a portal. The minute the slayers landed they went on the attack. There were a group of civilians trapped and the Avengers were just a little too far away to protect them.

Buffy distracted the Chitari soldiers in the most effective way - she beheaded the leader. In doing so the soldiers turned their attention to them and left the group alone. Faith wasted no time, she screamed, "Run", thankfully they listened. She wasn't sure what did it; her twisting the head off another foot soldier, or Buffy shooting one of the flying leviathans, and watching with a winning smile as it burnt to a crisp.

* * *

Flying above, Tony figured that he had died and gone to heaven. On the comm, he asked, "Thor did you invite any of your family to the party."

The snort belonged to Natasha, "We need to look at your definition of a party."

Thor, for a god, looked adorably confused, "Nay, there is only Loki and I."

Tony would have shrugged, except he was in a flying suit, "Okay so who are the hotchicks fighting down the block?"

Admittedly, the group did stare, but Stark soon bought them back to focus. "Guys I'm bringing the party to you."

Faith and Buffy had to admire the chutzpah of the group. A floppy haired, slightly older guy had driven through the carnage and stopped by them.

Captain America was staring at her, "Thanks for the assistance."

Buffy snickered, "We're hot chicks with superpowers and we were bored."

Faith grinned, salaciously, "Someone needs to protect your fine ass, Apple-pie."

The group found it adorable that Steve blushed, but interestingly, they noticed his smirk. It was nice to see that whilst he really did live up to the legend; he was only human.

The adorable little chick flick moment was broken by Stark's comment, "Brining it home now."

The others took a deep breath, unsure what they could do. Steve looked to Dr Banner, "It might be a good time to get angry."

Buffy saw how sad he was, and she was reminded of Oz, "That's not a problem, I'm always angry."

The leviathan that was tailing Tony was huge. The team were impressed that the two new women didn't blink when they saw Banner transform. He roared at the encroaching alien, but didn't move away from the group. Amazingly, he considered the tiny man to be a leader. Faith and Buffy didn't blink as they raised their crossbows once again.

Buffy looked to Steve, "Where's their weakness?"

"The underbelly."

Faith's eyes took on an unholy gleam, "Well, let's take the fight to them."

Hawkeye was in love, and at the same time, he was jealous. He had seen the women fight and was impressed, they were deadlier than Natasha, and he never thought that possible. Then he'd seen the blonde shoot a crossbow, and if he wasn't in the middle of a fight he would be flirting – right now. The reason he was jealous was their crossbows were reloading without them having to do it manually.

The leviathan exploded somewhere between the forth and tenth shot.

The team took a minute to collect their breaths, yet they could do no more.

Tony joined them, hovering just above. He charmingly gave two headpieces over to Buffy and Faith.

The faceplate receded so he could smile charmingly, "Welcome to the team. I always admire woman who are as deadly as they are beautiful."

Faith smirked, "Well, we were in the neighbourhood."

Steve sighed, frustrated. They were starting to make inroads into the aliens, but for every one they killed, two more appeared. Natasha could tell they had the same problem, "We need to close the portal."

Steve knew what they needed to do, he gave his team orders. He looked to the slayers, and smiling, "You're wildcards and I feel you know where best to fight."

It was ironic really, Buffy had died falling from a tower, but in this situation she would be best shooting from a rooftop. Faith nodded in agreement, the bond between the two slayers was such that they knew what the other was thinking. She had a jaunty grin, "Go and do the Robin Hood act, I'll keep Apple pie safe."

Buffy smirked, "It's a worthy cause... Hey Tincan will you give me a lift with Robin."

Hawkeye smirked, at least his nickname wasn't too bad. The archer found he work well with the blonde. They targeted together, it was clear that she was good enough not to need a spotter. The advantage of having two on the roof is that they could cover a larger area, and help both groups. She laughed in amusement as Hulk smashed into things with relish. Faith made a comment, "You B, think he'd like your hammer?"

Buffy snickered, "I'll make sure to wrap it up... party heading to you six o'clock. Rule number one."

Faith shot back, "Coming from the girl who has died three times."

Buffy snickered, "Do as I say, not as I do." She quipped rightback.

Hawkeye looked up, "You throw my kind parties."

Buffy looked to the side. "Well, looks like it is about to warm up."

Hawkeye agreed, "Guys, we'll be fighting for a few minutes."

* * *

On the ground, Steve was feeling truly alive for the first time this century. The woman next to him fought brilliantly, and she had an easy banter that made him relax. It was like being back with his unit in the war. He fell, having caught a blast. Faith picked him up, "Come on, you're not wimping out on me."

Steve shook his head, "Not me, miss."

Faith smirked as she protected his back, "Well we can't have America falling."

Buffy was twirling and stabbing with wild abandon. "Best workout ever. I'll even take the lecture from Dad."

Faiths snickered, "Nah, set Dr Eyepatch on G-man; he'll leave us alone."

On the roof, Hawkeye was taking a minute to be grateful for the assist, "Thanks for saving my ass."

Buffy looked him up and down, in an unmistakable way, "It's such a cute ass. It needs to be saved."

Well, he may have a whole butt load of issues, and a burning desire to put an arrow in Loki's eye, but if he could get a date out of all this, well. Everyone works better when they have incentives, right?

He smirked, and it was full of dirty promises. The type of promises which would help Buffy settle one of her H and H itches.

The fight was gaining momentum; Buffy saw Natasha gain hold of the staff. Thor was fighting his brother, and everyone was finally managing to make gains against the Chitari. Buffy and Clint were once again fighting on the ground, as the team was fighting back-to-back. She heard the team's horror when they announced the nuclear weapon.

Buffy watched in awe, and with a respect that came from already having done the same thing as Stark. She just said softly, "Go out with a bang, Tincan."

Stark chuckled softly, "I only wished I'd met you and your friend earlier."

Faith snickered, refusing to let the man dwell on what he was about to do. "Which one of us would you have slept with?"

Tony snorted, "Come on, the answer is easy - both of you. At the same time."

Faith saw Buffy smile, but it was haunted. She was determined though, so she continued the banter, "I don't know I would have been game, but B seems to like Legolas."

Tony mock sighed, "That's so not fair. I've got more charm, personality and money than him."

Faith snickered as she stabbed yet another soldier, "True but she likes them broody."

They heard Natasha's voice over the comm. "I can close the portal."

Steve looked stricken, but Buffy touched his shoulder. She didn't say anything; she was a leader. He would make the decision, but this was the sucky part of being a leader. "Close it."

* * *

The deed was done, but there are some days where everyone wins, and more importantly - lives.

The Hulk reacted quickest and moved to intercept his falling friend. He liked the tincan; he was like the fighting women; he was not afraid of the Hulk. He let go of him so as not to hurt him. "Hulk save Tincan."

The billionaire looked almost peaceful, the reactor didn't seem broken but they would not be able to save him, if he had internal bleeding. Buffy was clearly battle fatigued, "Hey Stark if you don't wake up, I'm letting Hulk do CPR."

Tony spluttered, coming back to consciousness. "Whatever happened to wanting to sleep with me?"

"You have a redhead to kiss you whenever you want, besides, I think I've gained a liking for Apple-pie." Faith observed.

The comment made Tony stare in disbelief; this was wrong on every level. Thor, not being aware of the humans' love of celebrating a happy ending, rained on their parade. "We still have my treacherous brother to deal with."

Unbeknownst to the others, Clint and Buffy, who had bonded about their hatred of gods had slipped off to handle Loki.

Buffy's handling of the god involved her throwing him all around the street until she got bored, or Clint, her new friend, was suitably avenged. It turns out that Clint had many unresolved feelings so it didn't look like she was going to be bored anytime soon. Still, all the other Avengers were here, so she threw him into the alleyway.

As he shook the ringing from his ears, he should have realised there was a reason that Sif liked this woman. He was met with a face full of weapons being pointed at him, and the Avengers.

"I'll have that drink now."

Tony, who was just about standing having been helped up by Steve, snickered, absolutely delighted by the turn in fortune. "Do you like my new friends? We are going to be BFF's, I can tell."

Fury, who had somehow managed to track them down, said a little wryly, "I'm not sure that the world can take Tony Stark and Lady Wyndham-Price being friends."

Faith laughed, "You say the nicest things eyepatch. On a scale of 1 - 10 how mad are the dads."

Buffy winced alongside Faith, they had figured that it was better to ask forgiveness than permission, but both knew they would be in for a lecture as a consequence. Fury just shook his head in bemusement; he had enough to deal with, with his own superhero bratty kids.

"Well I told Lord Giles that you were both safe and providing assistance to S.H.E.I.L.D agents, which we were appropriately grateful for. Then I had to promise you would be home in time for bed."

Buffy pouted, "But we were bored," then a wicked grin graced her features, "... besides I think I want to get my new friends better."

It was clear from who she was staring at, and how she was staring at Hawkeye - just who she wanted to be friends with.

Fury shook his head in bemusement, and his mind was going to nightmarish places. The thought of the Avengers and Slayers being friends could be beneficial –politically. Of course, they would then be able to influence each other. He really hoped that the world stayed standing if they did.

* * *

Fury should have planned for even worse contingencies: marriage, kids and deranged extended families; worse. I mean who the hell gives two year olds bow and arrows. Any other parents would have chewed out 'Uncle Tony', instead, Buffy and Clint took the bow, admired it and promised to teach the grasshopper. The next week there had been a similar incident, surely Captain America would balk about his three year old son being given a sword. Nope, not even a twitch, he just asked James to put it on the weapon wall, so Momma Faith could teach him.

Fury decided to retreat in order to preserve his sanity and leave. He'd take the sickos he dealt with everyday over dealing with the superheroes - they at least followed rules.

Finished! For now but there still stories I need to write for the competition so I will listen to any and all suggestions.


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note:** Okay, so several people wanted a sequel, but mainly, thanks has to go to ConstanceTruggle who a) fed my Buffy/Bat addiction and b) has read through and given great feedback on my work!  
**Disclaimer:** I sadly do not own the Avengers or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I only own my twisted imagination.

Also, huh, this just became a 'verse so that's now, itwo/i verses I'm writing for the Avengers. Oh well!

* * *

Babysitting is never fun, but if you are not of age, then it is the easiest way to make a buck. However, once you've reached adulthood, then you don't do it, but by this age you are far too cynical to be allowed around little people – it was like an unwritten rule. You are now, old enough to work in bar, and make money that way. It means not having to put up with your neighbours bratty kids because no one else can handle them, or wishes to do so.

Babysitting is in fact an exercise in keeping your sanity. When you are babysitting a child, whose parents are Buffy Summers and Clint Barton then this concept is in fact multiplied. It turns out a precocious five years old, whose idea of treat is to follow mommy and daddy to the practice range to have fun - is sometimes difficult to handle. Who knew?

Buffy was very confused, at how they had managed to go through so many babysitters - this included; slayers, friendly demons and S.H.E.I.L.D agents. The last S.H.E.I.L.D agent had freaked when Alex had slipped past to find his Uncle Bruce. Bruce would have not scared the agent, but he had actually found the tired toddler curled up on the Hulk's stomach. He'd royally freaked, and apologised to the infamous couple, up to the point of promising his first unborn. Buffy had wondered what the big deal was. She had tried to explain that when Alex was restless, the Hulk was the best way to rock him to sleep - something about the soothing rumbles. She had honestly meant to reassure him, but somehow this seemed to freak him out, to the point that he ran away.

Buffy had been very confused by this action and looked to her husband to see if he could explain. His response was tantamount to a shrug, and a, "What do you want from me? Natasha and I don't train them anymore."

* * *

Anyway, Buffy and Clint really wanted to go and watch a movie, with Steve and Faith sans children. Both the slayers and the Avengers, had had days to forget. The only trouble was that there was no babysitter available - apart from Uncle Tony.

Buffy and Clint actually loved Tony. Once he lets you past the prickly, playboy exterior you actually realise that he isn't a douchebag. Plus, the couple loved the presents he bought them - most explode. Tony had said that the way to the couples heart, was to find as many ways to turn medieval weapons into explosive medieval weapons.

Still, whilst they loved Tony, bless his heart. He wasn't the best at supervising minors. The couple were having the age old argument in their own apartment of the Avengers Towers, until the solution made itself obvious.

The AI spoke, "Excuse me Buffy, but I may have a solution."

Others were often freaked when faced with the Artificial Intelligence - Buffy and Faith – cooed. There first comments had been about awesome the AI was and they loved the British accent as it reminded them a little bit of London. As a consequence, Faith and Buffy were often treated more favourably than some of the others in the Tower- including Tony, which was a source of amusement for everyone.

"If I may, Tony loves watching the kids, and I'm always watching all the kids."

JARVIS always had the best ideas; Buffy was sure of it. She had caught the implication that JARVIS was including his creator in his definition of kids.

Clint smiled, understanding dawning, pleased that there evening had not been derailed. It was one thing that they'd all learnt. Yes, you could be the Chosen Two, or, part of the Avengers - easy peasy, but if you wanted to stay sane. Well, that required down time doing normal things. None of them wanted that apple-pie life, not even Steve, and nearly everyone thought he would. No, they had all learnt, at some point or another, that that life was not for them, but that didn't mean that they didn't value quiet lulls in activity.

Buffy smiled blindingly, distracting Clint from his task momentarily. She looked up at the ceiling, which although unnecessary the AI seemed fond of. "JARVIS you are kind of awesome, and the Ultimate Babysitter. If Alex or Annie gets into trouble you know our contact details. If Tony gets into trouble then you have Pepper's details."

Clint shook his head, the last time he checked; he had one son, and one niece. Still, he did kind of adore Buffy when she went into Momma-bear mode. It was scary, and hot, and if anyone dare threaten their cub - Well, they were clearly suicidal or not wishing to keep all their limbs.

However, Clint was just glad that they had found a reliable baby-sitter, and really, forget asking for references, the AI had been looking after Tony Stark for years. So if that didn't show how good a babysitter JARVIS was, then Clint was unsure what would.

* * *

As always I like to hear your opinions and ideas! Do you want more?


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Olympics: Avenger/Slayer style  
Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers or BtVS, I only borrow them, all rights belong to their respect owners.  
Summary: Fury was almost certain, that he'd left a memo that explicitly stated that the Slayers and Tony Stark were not allowed to be left alone together. It only ever led to a headache for him.  
Beta: The idea and the beat'ing service came from ContanceTruggle. If this is readable then thanks must go to her.

* * *

Fury was almost certain, that he'd left a memo that explicitly stated that the Slayers (S.H.I.E.L.D consultants) and Tony Stark were not allowed to be left alone together. He'd made the rule after they'd created a variety of weapons and then used said weaponry to booby-trap the offices of the Level 8 Agents. The result had been very embarrassed agents, who had to walk around all day in rainbow colours. The slayers had favoured multi-coloured paint grenades. The normal agents were becoming a little resentful of the Avengers, and that did not sit right with the slayers. So they figured if they couldn't kill them, then they would have to settle for embarrassment. Of course, sadly, it never struck the S.H.I.E.L.D agents that there was a reason they were elevated.

It had made one thing clear – do not let the three bored consultants be left unattended. For this reason alone, someone was going to be in pain, Fury would ensure it. The reason why is work within the headquarters had ceased to a halt. Why? Well, because the bored trio had come up with the idea of an Olympic style event. They were split up into three teams: slayers; avengers and normal S.H.I.E.L.D agents. So as not to cheat, the Slayers agreed to field only one slayer per event; of which there were seven. Also, it seems that the dating slayers would not face their lovers so as to ensure the fairest tests possible.

Fury returned to the headquarters in time to see the first event – Archery. Fury couldn't help but think it was unfair to call this a competition. It implied that there was more than one possible winner, in this case, not so much. Much to the red-headed slayer's disgust, Hawkeye won. Whilst Fury was happy to see an Avenger win, he could have done without seeing the enthusiastic celebration which was had by him and the blonde slayer. He did wonder though, who the crowd was more jealous of – Summers or Barton. It was close. Too close for him to guess. Not that he wanted that image, at all.

The next event to be contested was a twisted spy version of the pentathlon. Somehow, and he didn't want to know how, they'd designed a course. The course involved: throwing knives at a target followed by running a gauntlet of wooden boxing gloves that were oscillating at insane speeds. If you got through this, you were then required to throw a stake at a human shaped target before a 1000 metre run – finishing with a shooting competition akin to the trap shooting. The Avengers were cheering their team-mate, but poor Steve looked conflicted. In fact, the legend was stuck between cheering for Natasha, his team-mate, and Faith, his lover.

The S.H.I.E.L.D nominee was doing okay until he caught two sharp knocks from the punch bags. Oh, he shook it off, but by the time he did so, the women were already throwing stakes. Natasha took aim and threw, hitting dead centre – it would have been impressive – but Faith, just started to run and threw the stake with barely a glance. She heard the crowd gasp and rolled her eyes. Please, one vampire, and no immediate threat of danger? That was no challenge at all. Faith was super competitive so she ran flat out. She knew that Natasha would not appreciate her doing otherwise. It did rather put a speedy end to it; however, once she had an advantage, Faith wouldn't surrender it.

Avengers - 1, Slayers - 1, S.H.I.E.L.D – 0

The events continued and Fury was pleased that the S.H.I.E.L.D agents, who'd been stupid enough to give the Avengers grief had to yet to win an event. After six events, the S.H.E.I.L.D agents were yet to gain a win. The current standings were three for the avengers, and three for the Slayers.

It was all coming down to the last event. The hammer event with a twist. That meant that Buffy and Thor, yes that's right. They were going to spar and were going to use their Hammers. Clint was not too fond of the idea, personally. He had no doubt that his lover was badass, but he wasn't too keen seeing her face off against Mjolnir.

He shouldn't have worried. The first clash of steel rang through. Buffy and Thor, unbeknownst to the others, had already tested this. The Troll magic imbued in the hammer meant that Buffy could hold her own against the Mighty Mjolnir.

The crowd were silent. It was magnificent to watch, and visually astounding. Whilst many had understood that the slayers had strength, to see it in action – it was breath taking. Watching Buffy, small, quick-witted, and quick-footed against the strength and steel of Thor was amazing. Given the grins and amused faces of the sparring pair, they were also highly enjoying this. Fury shook his head, they were grinning, laughing, and if he was not mistaken trash talking in Ancient Norse.

The fight had changed in style; the warriors had seemingly gotten bored of sparring with metal. So had decided fists would be better. This was stunning! It was fast, it was brutal and everyone was riveted. The pair traded blow after blow, and neither faulted or seemed out of breath. The battle had gone on for over ten minutes, where Buffy seemed to find a second wind.

Clint snorted, it was a nice theory but he and Faith knew better. Buffy needed time to analyse and explore an opponent's weaknesses. The ten minutes would have given her a chance to get his scent, so to speak. Buffy's stance changed, she lengthened the gap and changed to using her infamous kicks. She unbelievably managed to engage a leg sweep that caught the God unaware, and Buffy pressed her advantage. Thor laughed good naturedly; this was the most fun he had had since battling Sif. He yielded, Buffy had won fair, and a foot near his neck was a definite win.

Buffy gave a small victory dance, but then re-enacted Clint's celebration. Fury did not want to see that at all. However, he should be careful about what he wished for as Tony got the bright idea to celebrate with a party at the Avengers Tower.

Fury would let them have their party, but if they caused a PR disaster…And Fury sensed it would be when not if. Then Stark was footing the bill; he wanted no part of this..


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy or the Avengers, I only own my twisted imagination

* * *

No one, Steve included, was exactly sure how he'd gotten Faith to marry him. He personally didn't care why; he just vowed to make sure that she never regretted loving him.

What he did value though was that no matter how crazy his life got; when he got home he'd find a haven with Faith, and their daughter Annie. All of the Avengers and their partners now lived in their own apartments within the Tower. Steve even now, couldn't help but snicker. He doubted that Tony had fully thought through his plan - as now, Darcy, Pepper, Buffy, Faith and Natasha - all lived under the same roof. The last shopping trip still gave the men nightmares.

* * *

However, today all he wanted to do was go home. He had battled Doom and his bots, and that was always tiresome.

They had finally managed to down the doom bots. Natasha was amusing herself by tying Doom up – who still wouldn't shut up. Steve wasn't sure what made him say it, although Faith was definitely an influence. He couldn't help the quip that fell from his lips, "You need to get over it, because Reed married Sue."

Tony was delighted, after the early days, he doubted that he would ever hear Captain America give anyone sass. He figured he was forgiven for snickering, "You know I think Faith has been a wonderful influence on you."

Steve had returned deadpan, "... and Pepper on you."

Thankfully, the entire event was finished, meaning they could take the jet back to the tower. Whilst the serum ensured that he couldn't be tired, physically - mentally, it was a different matter.

He was looking forward to seeing Faith and Annie.

* * *

Faith hated playing the aristocrat. She would do it because she'd accepted the adoption and therefore, she would do any necessary duties that were required. On the plus side, Buffy had to go to the same party as she was now Giles' adoptive daughter.

It was how they had ended up in Washington, at a political lunch - in freaking dresses - the non-sexy kind. She had been on her best behaviour, like Buffy - honest, but they had been tested beyond their limits. Buffy and she had sat through the lunch and for the most part, ignored the veiled comments about the superhero menace. After the sixth comment, their patience ran out. And that was that. The verbal dress down that she and Buffy had delivered had been glorious - albeit without violence. Both slayers had been worried that their Dad's would have been disappointed, but when they looked at Wes and Giles; they couldn't have been more wrong, no one could mistake the proud looks. Giles had actually confided that they were getting sick of the jibes against their son-in-laws and he was close to letting out 'Ripper'.

Sadly though, the chosen two still had one last thing to do before they could portal back to Avengers Tower. As they stepped into the training room they were beset by a whole lot of screaming, angst, and oh God, one of them was pulling hair. Faith shared a grin with Buffy, having had to play ladies all morning they welcomed the chance to cut loose. And neither was happy.

Buffy pursed her lips, "I'll take the left; you can have the right."

Faith loved how great minds think alike. "Meet in the middle?"

Buffy nodded and then she was off. The young slayers may be 'hotchicks with superpowers', but they had nothing on the chosen two. Buffy and Faith settled the argument fast and hard – with violence. It was refreshing. Buffy had rocked the mom's approach, once the slayers were sitting meekly. Oh boy, were they meek. Faith stood silently at Buffy's side. Buffy was standing in the middle of the room, hands on hips, "We take time to come and check on what is supposed to be the best slayer house and what do we find…"

One of the teen slayers, started to try and talk. Faith silenced her with a glare and carried on, "Minis with more strength than sense."

Buffy grinned at her, "Yeah that about sums it up. You know next time we should bring Annie and Alex. It seems they'll have friends.

Overall, it had been a relief for the slayers to return to their homes, but Faith had liked her sister slayers idea, to go out and watch a movie.

Faith had picked up her daughter from the S.H.E.I.L.D agent. Christ, they were pathetic, the kids get into one little swordfight and they get scared. She really hated when they couldn't get Darcy to mind the kids, others just freaked out.

It did however, leave her in a quandary. She loved Buffy's idea of going out but who could babysit?

Steve walked through the door, looking bedraggled. Faith took pity and gave him a hug, signalling for Annie to come and join them. She would never admit it aloud, but she loved the hugs - they were awesome. She would never give Buffy the blackmail material. Here, in this apartment, they were not Captain America and the Dark Slayer. They were just Faith and Steve, raising their daughter, Annie.

She had a wry smile, "Tough day?"

Steve grumbled, "I hate Doom's man crush."

Faith snickered, "Well I had a fun day at the office."

Steve led her back their couch "Tell me more."

"First we verbally smacked down some senator that was insulting the Avengers - Bonus the Dad's didn't yell ... Then we physically smacked down some slayers with more strength than sense."

Steve gave her a small smile; they never tried to ante up on their jobs. It was never a question of who had the tougher job, but rather that they didn't want to tempt the fates.

Faith sighed, "Buffy suggested that we go out with her and Legolas, but Darcy is not here."

Steve was certainly not averse to the idea, but asked in confusion, "So who will babysit?"

The AI broke in at that point, "If I may Lady Buffy may have found a solution."

They listened in apprehension, they loved Tony but he was not the best babysitter. However they grinned upon hearing about the AI's solution. All in all, yes their lives could get a little crazy but they wouldn't change a thing. So what if the best babysitter was an AI?


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors Note**: For PixieInTheDark - enjoy! Thanks to all who have read and reviewed the other stories in the 'verse.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters, all rights belong to their respective owners! I also do not own the rights to the song You ain't women enough to hurt my man.

* * *

Fury had never made it a habit of employing stupid people. It just wasn't sensible they cost too much to replace, and that was a pain. However two of his latest recruits, Clara Walker and Angela Stephens, were dragging down that average. Why? Well the girls were determined to sleep with two of his male agents.

Fury just knew that these two agents were about to be schooled - old-school. The idiots had been making a play for two of Shield's more infamous husbands. The two female agents were senators daughters, it rankled but even Fury had to play the political game. The daughters were spoilt and sitting at desks where they couldn't cause harm.

The harm that the 'wives' could cause though, well that was certainly more of an asurety.

At the start, the flirtations had been amusing and Faith, Buffy and Natasha had made jokes about it. And then Steve and Clint had made their initial polite rejections. The men had been firm, but made it clear that they were married and honored their wedding vows.

Clara's response to Steve had been very abrupt, "I'm not gonna tell your wife."

Angela's to Clint, "I don't care if you're married. No one needs to know."

For once in their lives, the Avengers had been speechless and mindful of the political capital of the two young agents - said nothing at all. Well they did mention how uncomfortable they were. You see Buffy and Faith had political power that they could use to make the agents back off. The men were teased but Clint had stopped that with one statement, "Yes the big bad archer will hide behind his woman."

Stark pouted because it really sucked the fun out of teasing Steve and Clint when they joined in. Buffy had grinned and promised that her vows to love, honor and all that jazz included protecting her hubby from tramps.

* * *

Fury wished sometimes that he'd made a rule about the Avengers training on the Hellicarrier. The highly trained agents, who for the most part he respected, would turn into the worst type of screaming fan-girls and boys when the Avengers trained. The drooling agents were sitting on the bleachers offering loud, often lewd comments. Fury didn't care which agent slept with which agent. However he did care when they caused friction in his top team. The solution was simple and rather elegant. Fury had offered the slayers the chance to settle the argument once and for all. It wasn't even a calculated risk.

At the moment Clint was sparring against Tony sans Armour and Steve and Thor were sparring. It was kind of an unfair match up any other way. That is not to say that the other Avengers didn't spar with them, but that part of training was considered, how to take a punch. Fury actually had to bite back a snicker; the slayers had definitely received their invite. He was also familiar with the tune they were humming, he would rarely admit to liking anyone, but the Slayers were two women that he definitely held a soft spot for.

_ You call to tell me something_  
_ You say I ought know_  
_ That he don't love me anymore_  
_ And I'll have to let him go_

He watched as the two slayers entered and they were dressed for business - in leathers. He smirked as he asked, "Are you thinking of a career change? You can hold a tune."

The agents were surprised to hear such warmth in the Directors voice. Then it begged the question, who was he talking too? Fury noted that the agents were desperately trying to get a better view of who he so obviously liked. Sadly though, they were so obvious that if they were out on the streets they would have easily been made. He made a mental note to ask Coulson to come up with a way to torture them. No scratch that, that wasn't what he'd write on the paperwork. The paperwork would read that the senior handler was asked to devise intense training session to correct serious concerns about professional development. Yeah that would definitely get past HR and legal.

The slayers gave him an innocent look, he knew better than anyone that this was a trap. "You know we heard this song on the radio …" Buffy started her gaze swept across the crowd until low and behold, her gaze held the bitch who'd made a play for her husband.

Faith picked up the conversation thread … "and it just struck a chord you know." Her movements flowing free and easy, making every man in the room that little bit more envious of Captain America.

Thor interrupted proceedings with his boom, "Slayers come spar - I'd welcome the challenge." He always held a soft spot for the Slayers and not just because they were married to Clint and Steve. For one, they had gone on a trip to Asgard with Sif and caused merry hell through the army ranks. Odin had been so impressed that he'd named them honorary Asgardians.

Fury mock sighed, "And I wanted you to finish the song."

Buffy's grin was all cocky arrogance, "We'll spar and finish the song." It could have been mistaken for arrogance or wishful boasting. In fact some in the crowd, the ones who'd never seen the slayers spar thought it was exactly that but they were in for a shock. After all it was just like Buffy said 'it wasn't arrogance if you could back it up with arrogance'.

Faith grinned, she loved sparring against the team but unless there was the Hulk, Thor and Steve on the team it wasn't a fair fight. The only fair fight was the Avengers v the Slayers. It used to bother the Avengers but as the Slayers had explained they were use to fighting unfavorable odds since they were young teens. Buffy had rolled her eyes and told them to get over it and learn from what they did.

_You say you're gonna take him _  
_ Oh but I don't think you can_  
_Because you ain't woman enough to take my man _

Clint found being professional very hard - sometimes. Oh don't get him wrong. He'll always complete the job. Yet it was a little harder when the job was sparring against his wife, who was wearing one his favourite leather outfits. He took one look at the mischievous glint in Buffy's eyes and realized that that was the point. He was grinning now, it didn't take a genius to connect the dots. She was going to solve his little stalker problem and have fun doing it. He always loved his wife but at this very moment, he loved her a little more.

_ Women like you, they're a dime a dozen_  
_You can buy 'em anywhere _  
_ For you to get to him I'd have to move over_

True to their word, the slayers had started to spar and continued singing as they went. It was a little disheartening to some of the fitness freaks when they noticed that the women could go full tilt against Thor and belt out a show tune. As they kicked, whirled, bent double to avoid blows and then returned vicious punches. Then with a mischievous grin that Fury only barely caught they executed a pre-planned move that made Fury laugh. Faith and Buffy grabbed each others hand and executed a tandem kick that caused both Steve and Clint to land on the floor. The second they were down the slayers were upon them and straddling them - pinning them to the floor.

_ And I'm gonna stand right here_  
_ Well it'll be over my dead body _  
_ So get out while you can_  
_'Cause you ain't woman enough to take my man' _

Fury had to admire the style of the slayers and was appropriately grateful that they'd sent a message without causing physical harm against the agents in question. Oh don't get him wrong he'd have probably made it go away. However he did appreciate not having to deal with the agents fathers - Senators always had a such a sense of entitlement. He did so enjoy showing them that it didn't work with him. When that failed he'd usually set Buffy on them. She had grown in recent years, oh don't get him wrong, there was no one like her when it came to fighting. What Fury was thinking about though was how well she'd taken to fighting on a political level. She had learnt a lot from her adoptive father and she played dirty. A bit like now really.

The two couples were keeping their appearances PG but none could mistake the sexual tension. The message was loud and clear - look don't touch.

_Sometimes a man goes lookin' at things that he don't need _  
_He'd take a second look at you _  
_But he's in love with me _  
_Well I don't know where that leaves you _  
_Oh but I know where I'll stand _  
_And you ain't woman enough to take my man _

Clint chuckled as he let himself be helped up. He grinned and pulled his wife close, "Oh babe. Others can tease and look but you're my one and only."

Fury rolled his eyes, "That's so sweet ... go on and get out of my sight."

Buffy clapped and giggled as she watched Faith all but drag her hubby away. You ain't women enough indeed. Her final sight was watching the venting women bitch to each other as they watched them leave.

Life was good and then there was the night ... that was better.


End file.
